So I'm on the bus home when this homeless dude slides up to me. He smelled like hot garbage and three day old cat shit but, who am I to judge. The following conversation took place, no lie:
Bum: Hey boy you seen God?
Me: Nope but, the I was able to spell God with my alphabits this morning.
Bum: You think I'm funnin with you boy, I'm serious.
Me: Sorry I'm just a little light headed from the fumes.
Bum: (Pissy tone) Maybe I ought'n'ta save you.
Me: Save me from what, fresh air?
Bum: Fuck you, you little bastard, you'll get what's coming.
Me: God bless.
What a douche right? Anywho if I wind up dead and there is the curious odor of hot garbage and three day old cat shit just look around the dumpsters behind the IHOP on 45th and you'll find your man.
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